the list

19 Mar

I have recently learned that I am a pseudo-perfectionist.  What this means is that sometimes I am so completely nauseatingly a perfectionist and other times I don’t care AT ALL.

Take yesterday, for example.  Here was my completely manageable list of Sunday items to accomplish:
1- Gym
3- Clean eeeverything
4- Apply for 1 job
5- Pay bills and reorg. pile of mail

On many a Sunday I have crossed easily double this amount of to dos off the list and maybe even thrown “bake a cake just for fun” in there.

Do you want to know what I accomplished from my list yesterday?
1- Gym

I also added two new items just for fun:
1-Watch two episodes of The Golden Girls (why is that show just SO good?)
2-Clear out all the shows on my DVR

Now, I clearly got into a little slump funk yesterday but I have to admit that it isn’t like something like this has never happened before.  At first, I was feelin’ all guilty.

But, it’s Sunday.  The day of rest.  A time to relax.  Mental vacation before a busy week. I tried to tell myself all of these things and while I couldn’t break the guilt away, it obviously wasn’t strong enough to get me to actually do something about it.

The weird thing is that as time moved on I think I finally hit a point where I ::gasp:: just didn’t seem to care.  I even got angry at my list for even getting in the way of my day of nothing! The reality, I realized, is each item would be waiting for me the next day and the world wouldn’t stop as a result.

So, there you have it.  I’m a perfectionist imposter and I’m not afraid to admit it.

Now, if you’ll excuse me – I have to lug out the vacuum and get this show on the road. I said I was a fake perfectionist, not a monster!


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